Experience

• 

  Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory

  • Oompa - Loompa -Team Leader

    • Jan 2013 - Present

    Making sure the wee guys make the chocolate properly and don't fuck about. I also write their work songs.

• 

  General Disillusionment LTD

  • South Purgatory

  • Depressive Serf

    • Jan 2006 - Jan 2013
    • South Purgatory

    Due to fucking up my life I am now at the bottom of the pyramid.I perform menial tasks in exchange for currency.Lol:)

• 

  Big Bad Barry's Big Bad Business

  • ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE

  • Bad Guy

    • Apr 1989 - Jun 2005
    • ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE

    So much Bad Stuff, you just can't imagine.Credit Crisis, Jimmy Saville, Twin Towers, ALton Towers, Jurassic Park, Enron, Hiroshima, 1984, the whole fucking lot.

• 

  Self-employed

  • Artist

    • Mar 1964 - Aug 1988

    I did the Mona Lisa, couple of Rembrants, beat Duchamp at chess and pissed in his potty. Helped Jackson Pollock learn ow to drive.Founded various art movement such as surrealism, abstract expressionism, conceptual art, cubism, and boring art.Taught Pablo Picasso how to hold a pencil.Haven't t...