Experience

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  Disneyland Paris

  • France

  • Meeter Greeter

    • Jan 1995 - Feb 1995
    • France

    Dressing up as a rodent and shaking peoples hands. I got fed up with the poor utillisation of my time and skill base. After a month I said to my line manager Walter " In my opinion this is a right Micky Mouse organisation I'm off mate!"

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  Archimedes Scientific Discoveries

  • Syracuse Italy

  • Towel Holder/Bathing Assistant

    • Jan 1982 - Jan 1982
    • Syracuse Italy

    In the early 80's I underwent hypnotic regression back to 256BC where it was revealed that in a former life I had been employed by Archimedes. My role officially was Towel Holder on project Eureka butI found myself getting involved in the "heavy thinking" and "brain storming" sessions that were taking place by old Arch at the time. All was well until one day Old Arch threw himself into the bath and flooded the bathroom prompting me to remind him that my role was to "hold the towel" not clean up flooded bathrooms!. At this point I also pointed out that I wasn't given a joint credit on some of his ideas and prompted me to say "screw you Archimedes, I'm out of here".With hindsight I should not of said "screw" you as that gave him yet another idea that I wasn't given the credit for!

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  Ideel Toys

  • Hungary

  • Rubix Cube Design Assistant

    • Jan 1980 - Feb 1981
    • Hungary

    Assisted with the marketing and development of the Rubix Cube. All was well until I suggested a variant for very stupid people with no moving parts(cheap to manufacture) and 1 coloured square per side instead of the 9 that they went with in the end. Erno and his mates pointed out that my idea was merely a coloured dice and it had been done already. After this rejection I said "that 9 coloured square idea won't catch on mate its too flipping hard! I'm out of here"

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  Epstein Productions

  • Liverpool, United Kingdom

  • A&R Man

    • Jan 1962 - Mar 1963
    • Liverpool, United Kingdom

    Searching Talent from the pool of Merseybeat Bands. That swine Epstein claimed he discovered the Fab 4 rather than me so I told him to stick it!

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  US Military Special Projects

  • Top Secret Bunker US

  • Assistant

    • Jan 1939 - Jan 1946
    • Top Secret Bunker US

    Planning a big bang in the US bomb industry with a couple of guys called Oppenheimer and Einstein.Suggested calling the bomb "Big Girl" but was over ruled so I said "Oy Albert, I'm out of here"

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  Dupont Research Labs

  • New Jersey USA

  • Researcher

    • Mar 1938 - Apr 1938
    • New Jersey USA

    As part of the race to develop a non-stick surface for cooking utensils I was employed with a colleague Dr Roy Plunkett and we were encouraged to work separately in a "race" to invent theproduct before each other. The labs back in those days were artificially lit with no windows or telephones and only one access door for secrecy. We all had a lab each and I worked feverishly in a bid to be the first to the prize. Unfortunately due to a bizarre oversight on my part I lost the race to be credited with the invention of the substance that would become Teflon. On Monday April 6th 1938 Roy announced that he had made the discovery. Roy was a bit shrewder than me and had chosen to coat some metal objects such as pans and kitchen utensils. I neglected to bring any objects with me to my lab and in desperation I coated one of the few metal objects available to me. With hindsight the metal doorknob was probably not the greatest idea that I'd had.On Friday 3rd I actually discovered Teflon but as I couldn't grip the doorknob and open the door to tell anyone I had to spend the weekend in the lab until Monday before someone let me out. Roy was credited with the discovery but in reality I got there first. I was LIVID and found myself saying to my bosses "that's it there's no way i am sticking around here"

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  House of Chanel

  • Paris

  • Fashion designers assistant

    • Jan 1926 - May 1926
    • Paris

    Massaging the egos of the rich and famous with such phrases as "suits you" an "oo you look nice".Had a hand in the development of the signature garment of the time however my suggestion of a "large white smock" was rejected out of hand and they went with the "little black dress" as a total opposite of my idea! Hence I said "Je suis d'ici"

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  Curie Labs

  • Poland

  • Lab Technician

    • Jan 1902 - Jan 1908
    • Poland

    Worked on the "glow in the dark" project to discover radiation. They got the Nobel prize and nevermentioned me in the credits so I said "Listen to me you pair, How come you got the prize and all I got was this big glowing head? That's it I'm outta here!"From that day to this I don't need a night light in my house.